Maybe I'll Be a Superhero
by Cally Starkiller
Summary: Why be the savior of the galaxy, hero that saved the Citadel, the first human spectre when you can be a superhero? A oneshot.


**This was totally inspired by the 'Gilmore Girls', a tv series. **

**Credit goes to the show for inspiration. **

**Why is it I can always work faster on ideas that randomly pop into my head when I have like five other stories to work on?**

**I'll never understand, but no worries people, those other stories will be updated soon enough.**

**A oneshot. **

**Enjoy.**

* * *

"I can't believe I nearly broke my hand this morning." Shepard whined, staring down at the poorly wrapped bandages on her small hand.

"What were you even doing trying to 'save' your cat from the shelf?" Garrus pointed out, shaking his head.

"Well she was meowing like crazy and I wanted to sleep in without noise so I decided to go and rescue her from certain death. But look what it gave me! I almost died myself!" Shepard was gesturing wildly, nearly smacking Garrus in the face.

The two continued walking side by side, their small vacation being spent on the Citadel.

"Oh my god!" Shepard exclaimed loudly, peeking under her bandages.

"Don't mess with your bandages." Garrus wanted to sigh, his Commander acted like a child sometimes.

"I think its glowing!" Shepard's grin grew wider with her revelation.

"Oh spirits…" Garrus mumbled, mentally face palming himself.

"See look! The blood is turning from bright red to dark brown red." Shepard poked it, red residue spewing out. Garrus wanted to gag.

"Would you stop that?" Garrus cringed at how many times Shepard was poking her bloody gash.

"Maybe I'll become a superhero!" While Shepard's face lit up, Garrus' face was downcast. "Maybe I cut my hand over some sort of foreign alien metal and its altering my genetic material!"

Garrus interjected the madness. "Well the metal **IS **foreign and alien, depending on what kind of equipment the Illusive Man used…"

Shepard instead chose to ignore his logical reasoning and continued on ranting happily. At least the rant was happy. "I wonder if I'll be able to control inanimate objects! Like our fridge, Caboose."

"You named the fridge…?" Garrus said incredulously, glancing worriedly at his Commander. She was nuts. Plain and simple.

"Yeah course I did! I name everything!" Shepard was still giving him her silly grin that seemed to be permanently stuck.

"Oh yeah?" Garrus slightly chuckled. "Then what about the bench? You never named the bench." Garrus pointed at a random bench, a salarian and asari both sitting down on it.

"…Leonardo." Shepard said after a moment, drawling it out as if to be still thinking about the name for it.

"You just made that up." Garrus accused, shaking his head for the hundredth time.

"No I didn't." Shepard quipped back, glimpsing at the bench again and nodded, seeming to be accepting of its newly acquired name.

"Continue…" Garrus gestured for her to go on with her small rant.

"But like I said! Inanimate objects, like the elevator! I could make it go faster with my new power! Commander Shepard the Superhero! Fits better then Commander Shepard the Spectre huh?"

Shepard and Garrus both walked around the corner, reaching their favorite restaurant on the Citadel where they knew the owner there.

"We'll pick out your cape after breakfast." Garrus had to practically guide her inside, inwardly shaking with small laughter.

"Hey Dean! We need-" Shepard stopped shouting at the sight of Dean's other cook, Stacey.

"Oh great. Stacey is here instead." Garrus decided to point out the obvious, Shepard's grin disappearing.

"She doesn't make the bacon as good as Dean's!" Shepard was going to resort to childish pouting but decided against it, instead walking behind the counter and up the stairs where Dean had his living space at.

Garrus just stared after her, waiting patiently until she arrived back.

"Stupid…oh come on!" Shepard heard loud yelling and curses emanating from inside.

"Uh…Dean?" Another barrage of yelling only greeted her. "Dean are you being attacked by your holopads again?"

A few loud footsteps and the door swung open, revealing a rather tall man with an unshaven appearance, a shirt thrown over his shirt. "Uh…Shepard! Hey." Dean said rather sheepishly, gazing down at her. Shepard still couldn't get over the fact how tall this man was then her.

"Watching the game?" Shepard side stepped him, walking into his small living space above his restaurant. Her stare was directed at the holotv, a football game on. "Who's winning?"

"Uh oh right, the Jets." Dean came up beside her, a frown etched on his features.

"Huh, figured." Shepard shook her head, sighing. "This is like the fifteenth time in a century."

"Right right…so what are you doing up here?" Dean looked at her strangely, crossing his arms, still oblivious of the shirt hanging off his shoulder.

Shepard let out an exaggerated sigh, holding up her bandaged hand. "I had a near death experience this morning."

"Don't you always?" Dean shrugged, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes but…this one was different!" Shepard started picking at her bandages again, earning a shudder from her recently new friend.

"Different from all the other near death experiences you've had?" Dean let out a small bark of laughter, looking down at her hand.

"Yes. Very. Now I want you to make me and Garrus some bacon, please?"

"You and Garrus…?" Dean nodded once, turning around and turned off the holotv. "Well Stacey can make them. I'm busy up here."

"Busy NOT watching the game?" Shepard made a small movement toward the now turned off holotv.

"No. Busy cleaning up and looking for my shipment holopad." Dean raised his arms, and Shepard glanced around his dirty room, holopads scattered about.

"Huh. Your shirt helping you look for it?" Shepard smirked, nodding up at the navy blue plaid shirt that was still hanging on him.

Dean took a double take and finally ripped it off, throwing it on a pile of holopads. "…like I said, have Stacey make the bacon."

"But she doesn't make it as crispy and spicy as you do!" The whole time Dean was shaking his head, Shepard going out of her joking Commander voice and into her pleading voice. "Plus…she's annoying with that whiny voice of hers. Very unprofessional of her to use it."

"Kinda like how you're talking right now?" Dean fired back, wiping the frown off his face and replaced it with a wide grin.

Shepard just shook her head. "Please Dean? Pretty please and I'll stop talking like this!"

"Oh come on Shepard, I'm busy finding-" At that Shepard spotted a holopad on his desk that was entitled, 'Shipment Order', and picked it up.

"Finding this?" A plan formulated in her mind, Shepard keeping the holopad behind her.

"Yes, that. Give it." Dean reached for it but Shepard only backed off toward the door.

"Only if you make the bacon!" Shepard bargained, keeping the holopad as a hostage. "If you do, I might even be able to organize and move around your holopads with my new superhero power!"

A grunt from Dean and he finally complied. "Fine fine…" He practically pushed her out of his room and toward the stairs. "…wait what superhero powers?"


End file.
